I remember it was 1998 summer I had gone for a conference and there was some motivating speaker talking about facing fears and love and family etc etc. On my way back on the plane somehow my thoughts went to how every one in my family wanted a dog and I did not and how I was so scared of dogs. It was in Detroit airport I made a note to my self that one day I wanted to get over my fear of dogs and get a dog because I love my family and I wanted to do that much for everyone's happiness.
Niyati grew up with Shelby (Jane- her babysitter's dog) and she loved animals. Everyday when I picked up Niyati from Jane's 2-3 year old Niyati would tell me "don't be scared Mom she is very nice"
Because of me Niyati went through so many heartbreaks!! Instead of Dog I brought her a bunny "snow flake"from Maryland ! She was so happy, so caring and in love with snow flake! In our apartment in Parma it was night time when we brought Niyati home from Jane's and showed her a little white fluffy bunny in a box as a gift for staying with Jane for couple of nights when we went for interviews in Maryland.
We bought a house in West lake. Snowflake came with us. Gold fish were put in a Ziploc bag with water and air but somehow two of them died on arrival to new home :((( I was sad and felt it was a bad omen and not a good sign. We had to flush them down the toilet by the kitchen. Niyati was very sad. Then Jayaben came to rescue. She said fish dying was not a bad omen it was sort of " घात गयी" meaning the quota of death in that house was done now no one will die in that house! So it was not a bad omen after all. Niyati even took snowflake for show and tell to her KG class. Life was good awaiting Bijal's birth and adjusting in new home. First my Ba came to help me with Bijal for few days before her birth she did not care much about snowflake after all she was my mother. Then came Dad's Ba after a month or two. She helped Niyati take care of snowflake and told her that its not good to keep one bunny every species need their kind to play with and sleep with. Niyati protested that snowflake had Niyati as a buddy but Ba kept explaining patiently and Niyati agreed in the end. We took Snowflake to a farm on Columbia rd and that was perhaps Niyati's saddest day in her 6 yrs of life :((( She cried a lot but gave up snowflake to her soul mates.
After that the chapter of animals was quite for long time Niyati had her baby sister now so she was happy. Every now and then we did go back to farm to see snowflake and I remember once we even went there to sing her "happy birthday" Two years went by and now we have 2 yr old Bijal and baby Neilay. Babies are not a fascination for Niyati any more she loved her brother and sister but she was busy with friends and her life. Her friends had dogs and here we go again, craving for a dog. I researched and asked my friends and found out that cats were very self sufficient and very easy to take care. Dogs required lots of work, expenses and attention. So talked Niyati into having a cat instead of a dog. One fine evening we brought home a beautiful Grey white kitten. She was very playful and adventurous. She used to hide a lot so we named her "Meeley"
Niyati was attached to her instantly and Bijal was very curious about her and never noticed her little baby brother who just slept and fed. I believe Meeley is a big reason Bijal did not go through jealousy with Neilay. Meeley loved to climb everywhere, walk on banister flawlessly and we would all worry about her falling !
I guess Meeley had a good time while she was gone. She went to Sandusky and fished in lake, she was pregnant and had some litter we even went to see her babies and again Niyati was heart broken looking at the conditions she was living in. She wanted her to come back,I was not ready but you know Niyati one persistent girl! She figured out all the details of bringing her home all logistics. There was not even google then to research. She called her friends and other cat lovers even borrowed someone's cage and arranged with Mrs.Holiday to bring Meeley to my work so I can drive her back. Well I did my research of having relative peaceful time with Meeley. I was advised to get her fixed and declaw and now thinking back sounds pretty inhumane! At least she had her babies by then. It was One of the happiest day for Niyati to have Meeley come back. By now Meeley was mature and was not jumping on counters and Neilay was also 2 ish so no more bottles for him. We also had Jerry to help me so I guess I was little more relaxed. Well everything was going OK but again somehow by now Bijal is older and again "I want dog" started coming back in our lives. By now even Bharat joined the kids and he too wanted a dog. Again I talked them into something else this time hemsters from my nurse Anne. We got 2 hamsters to give each other company we thought we got two girl hamsters but soon we had many more again I managed to talk everyone into getting rid of these hampsters to a pet shop on Detroit rd.
Now Neilay joined the gang for dog! I talked him into turtles and we had Hicka and Matticka and by now we are in new house and Neilay is around 6 yrs old around 1997-1998. Turtles are truly boring. Now the whole family has turned into real American family who thought we are not a happy family until we have a dog!! I started feeling like I was one mean person not wanting family to be happy. Just then I attended this conference in I think Phoenix and on my way from Detroit I wrote down my weaknesses and wrote " one day I will let my family have a dog" One of the way they had said in lecture to handle fear was to imagine good things. You have to understand fear of dog was ingrained in my brain and heart since my childhood. In India we have many stray dogs and once a dog had chased Arati when she was I think 7th or 8th grade, she ran and dog was of course running faster after her and without realizing she climbed over a gate which had long sharp nails and she fell on the other side of the gate bleeding from hand, feet and scared to death. Once in Mala's house her dog chased me and I came across a wall with chair I climbed on chair and thought now I am finished but nothing happened because at that point her older cousin showed up and pulled the dog. When I was resident in civil hospital I saw a girl die of rabies and saw gradual decline and death after a dog bite so I had to get all these pictures out of my mind and put nice pictures of having a dog! I remember imagining cute picture of a little puppy running to me on the field and I had my arms open!!! Haha little did I know then that happens only in movies I guess. At least it never happened with Kajol. With Kajol we had to run after her on our street when she just took off !
I was still working on loving every one and working on this " unconditional love" etc etc. In 1999 June Ba, Dada , Urufoi, Aekta and Mukeshfua came to live with us. Urufoi was very sick and Niyati was gracious to stay home with Urufoi so we could go to West Verginia for a vacation. We decided to rent a speed boat from this person and bharat was signing papers on his patio table on the deck. Neialy Bijal and I were just sitting at the table and I felt something by my feet so looked under there was a tiny puppy looking stright at me sitting on my feet!! Neilay and Bijal were so thrilled! They started playing with puppy but puppy kept coming to me even though I showed no interest. we signed papers and started going towards the boat and puppy followed us and especially followed me Bijal kept saying "ohhh look mommy he loves you so adorable, can we have him??" She picked it up and brought to me and puppy licked my cheeck. I guess puppy knew how to get an entry in the family. i refused and kept walking and we went to lake on the speed boat
Well the puppy talked continued rest of the evening and into dinner "please please please mom, mom puppy loves you, soo cute, if we don't rescue they'll put him to sleep etc etc." I said lets call Niyati we will do what she says. Niyati was not too sure she asked tons of questions I think she liked the idea of dog but not a stray dog, we had not done research, were we really ready ? She also did not like puppy to put to sleep so reluctantly she agreed. I was still not convinced but did not want to be this heartless person who would be OK to put puppy to sleep!! So in the morning we went back and got the puppy just then we found out that it was a girl and she was Shephard husky mix and about 6 weeks old. Drive from west verginia to home was uneventful. When we came home Niyati had lots of things ready for the puppy including books to read about shephard and husky. I do not remeber how we decided to name her Kajol but name stuck with her.
Initial days were eyeopener for me. We had no idea how to and what to do with puppy she had freedom to go anywhere in the house and cleaning lady Kristine was disgusted to find poop and pee spots all over the house. Infact she left us soon after I guess because of Kajol. Ba ( dad's) was very comfortable and told us to give rotli, milk etc. I remember Aekta was also helping to take her out for pee and poop. We then started tying rope around deck so she can have fun outside. Atlast we started taking her to puppy training school and learnt a few things. Mostly Niyati started learning from friends and reading about keeping her in cage, house training etc etc. She was still very free spirited and we hired some trainer who was very strict and she started behaving but I guess he made her very timid. We even left her with him when we went on vacation to Mexico and when we returned she was very scared, emaciated and since then we decided to fire that trainer. By then Helga started working for us and Kajol loved Helga and Helga loved Kajol so little by little we all started to learn, adjust and behave! She started to be a part of family and she truely belonged in the fanily. Our extended family upadhyayas, kaka, kaki, Rahul Sheffie also enjoyed her and the way she loved Kaka and his family every one started saying she has Majufoi's soul!!
Ok it still does not make sense why I said " dog is god spelled back wards" Well I will come to that.
The spiritual realization of Kajol's role in my life came much later may be around 2009-2010.
